The Love of Food

I love food, I really do.

I'm not covetous though, you won't see me beg for another person's food in the name of the love I have for food but the love I have for food is beyond words. This doesn't mean I can't fast, I do that pretty well so I guess I'd say that I love food but I'm not addicted to it. See the rubbish I'm writing sef just because of food. I've eaten thrice already today although not in large volumes and I'm still hungry but I have my seniors, the ones who eat on earth and even heaven acknowledges it. The ones who express their love for food anywhere they are and in anyway they can. One of such people is my bestfriend, Bisi (maybe that's why we're bestfriends, just kidding). She won't express the love in public though (she's an introvert but even some extroverts won't) but I and Bisi would go out to eat something like fufu, on our way back home, she'd buy bread claiming that the food we ate would have 'expired' by the time we get home. On getting home, bread and tea goes in next and after 30 minutes, she's already complaining of hunger (three gbosa for her).

I thought Bisi liked food until I attended this wedding. My roomate invited me to this wedding, more like dragged me there but there were, 3 of us, I, my roomie and our friend, Linda. We proceeded to the reception after the church wedding which took place at the bride's place. The canopies were three or four in number and they were tagged indicating where people should sit depending on the group they belonged to so we sat under the one tagged 'friends'. A guy sat by my right, I'm not remembering this because of his gender but because he was the one who inspired this write up, he's the reason I'm doing this. There he was by my right, roomie by my left with Linda. After all the music, mc making jokes, couples dance, presentation of gifts, bla bla bla, they finally came to the session we were all waiting for, at least I was sure that I and the guy beside me was waiting for it and this moment was the "item 7" time, the time where we get rewarded for attending the wedding through food. Prior to the menu-menu time, the guy had been trying to initiate a conversation with me but I just played dumb, not because I was a snob but I was hungry mehn, can't be gisting on empty stomach na, but when I saw that there was food going round, I gisted with him (not too happily though so he won't think our wedding would be next plus he wasn't cute).

Caterers were in charge of the feeding. So they got to his turn, he was served semo I think with egusi and two big sexy meats that I eyed almost immediately. The waiters weren't serving accordingly as people's choices of food varied from rice and vegetable sauce to semo and egusi etc. Before they could get to my turn, the guy finished his food then collected another plate of rice while they were still serving the food. I decided to break the jinx of eating only rice at parties hence, the semo I eyed or better still the meats I eyed. It didn't take long before I got my heart desire and the food wasn't even as nice as I thought, no wonder people say that looks can be deceiving but not to worry, the meats were enough consolation for me. I tried eating my food in peace but this guy just kept asking me mumu questions like "can you cook this kind of soup?" didn't even know what to say so I let it slide hoping he'd shut up, after a while I think he got the message because he stopped talking. I observed however that he came with some other people, women though with kids, I think they were friends to the bride's family, the guy inclusive. He was talking to them and then the waiter served their food too, one of the kids said his food was much so the guy collected it again and started to devour. I was baffled until I realized I had began to show it by looking at the guy with disgust like what the heck! Would they kill you for Christmas or something? At least eating anyhow under that circumstance would be understood since you're being fed for a purpose. As if I scared him, he shamelessly gave the boy the rest of the food. I thanked God for him until the drinks came. He took a can of gulder, gulped it down his throat in no time, took another, and another and another until one guy shouted "ahn ahn, guy, don't you know you're outside, have you no shame..." the foodie replied "if you want more, can't you just ask instead of insulting others". Violence almost erupted but thank God they didn't create a scene. I was astonished by the foodie, kilode, why would you eat like that then drink like that because it's free food now means you should eat against the following month? We ate our food sha then went back home.

I remember offering someone gala a while back on my way to school, instead of him to give the cliché response 'no, thank you', he collected it sharply, I said Nawa oo, people don't want to dull again sef. There's this funny one too that happened, I was on my way to ikeja from Allen avenue, in a tricycle though, I was eating hobnobs, digestive biscuit. I ate what I wanted then kept the rest in my bag but it was obvious the way I kept it because my bag was small, the woman beside me alighted on getting to her destination and while waiting for her change from the keke driver, she told me "sister, abeg give me one of that biscuit, I dey too like am", I gave it to her feeling funny. I kept wondering why people do that, I believe in buying it if I like it and if I don't have money, manage till I have but that's just me and I shouldn't judge based on that. Maybe they didn't even like food like me but their own approach was different (the wedding guy excluded though, I'd never eat like that even in my closet).

Please if you love food with all your life, let it be minimal, don't beg from strangers and don't eat anyhow in public except if you're paying for it (even if you are sef, do am small small). Biko it's not a nice sight to see someone eating 3 or more plates of food at a reception or any other party. Don't be a super-foodie.

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