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At The Wedding...



This is a pointless gist so I beg you not to read, please don’t read this, please….sigh. okay, I’m going to continue now that you’ve decided to read against my warning. So I almost had a nice weekend two weekends ago, the almost is there because I was quite ill at some point. I was supposed to post this last week but jkghjhdfj happened so here we are. The wedding I attended on Saturday is the reason behind this, not the other events that flooded my weekend. So Bisi (bestie) and I got to this wedding ceremony after hours of me screaming about her being too sluggish – we went to the wedding almost five hours after they had started, no kidding. I was grateful we went that late. Her mum first complained about our outfits because we decided to show off our arms oh, ordinary arms, not cleavage or thighs. She reported us to her friends and she couldn’t get over it till she left and we were like jghjhgj?

I saw Ajoke again (Bisi’s cousin), very cool chic so we all gisted and since they decided not to serve Bisi and I food at the wedding, maybe as a punishment for our dress, there was nothing much we could do. Ajoke complained that the wedding was too boring for her liking because no soft drinks or secular music. Secular music according to her would have been appropriate because the bride was a muslim and the bridegroom was a Christian so it’ll have been balanced that way, I agreed. To be honest, I just wanted to eat. I can’t enter four buses and not get rewarded with some food, please don’t play rough play.


Bisi started noticing things. She said the bride didn’t look happy; the guy was obviously the only one in love so we were observing together. We saw that the bride was also pregnant and that their cake was just a three step not an actual wedding cake. We had to nibble on Ajoke’s food (we met her there so she already had food which she barely touched and wasn’t planning to; spare me your poison lessons). Our food eventually came but I already lost interest. I ate my meat though, they were very sexy.
 
The bride was very beautiful but she didn’t smile 80% of the time, responded as if she was in the middle of an argument but I made excuses for her. She was probably stressed because she’s pregnant plus wedding stress, it can be very tiring (coming from an unmarried person). So Bisi’s grandma gisted us later about how that wasn’t the initial chic the guy introduced to them and we were like oh okay, everything just made sense.

Ajoke started trying to figure out why the guy wasn’t with the intended wifey but I figured she was the side chic who mistakenly got pregnant and that was the option they had but what’s my own? Ajoke told us about a woman who left her husband because he was broke, Bisi disagreed saying we didn’t know the full story so we should not judge and I was like abegi…marriage with side chic (my theory), abandoned true love finds her truthful true love, jollof rice still bae, party meat still sexy, slayers get slayed, running stomach comes after, heels change to flat slippers, unmarried ladies go home unmarried, just another Saturday.

#anotherboringpiece  #ekedunni 


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